New song today. To the tune of “The Yellow Rose of Texas”.
Got a cold blue nose in Texas,
'Cause it's minus three degrees,
We’ve had hurricanes and earthquakes,
But who knew we could freeze?
There's a boil-water notice,
But no power for to boil,
And the governor blames the windmills --
Coulda sworn we had some oil.
Texas had deregulation
Of the local power grids,
Then they chose state isolation,
To keep out those evil feds,
They said “no” to routine maintenance,
Wouldn't weatherize power plants,
Now the whole damn state’s an ice rink,
And they beg for federal grants.
There’s a Texas junior Senator
Who keeps migrating south,
From Calgary to Austin,
And he just can't shut his mouth,
In the middle of this snowstorm,
Took his family to Cancun,
Then blamed his wife and children,
What a sorry-ass buffoon.
With two dozen people frozen,
And two million left to go,
And look! Tomorrow's forecast
Is another blast of snow.
The ceiling fans have icicles,
My dog’s stuck to the ground,
So my cold blue nose in Texas
Is warm Wisconsin bound!
(optional happy ending verse)
Now, the government in Texas
Once again just drops the ball,
But the new administration
Has a handle on it all,
O’Rourke’s been calling seniors,
And help is on the way,
So my cold blue nose in Texas
Will be warm and dry someday!