It's a bit cartoonish, but what better way to celebrate Senator Leahy's brave FAIL attempt than with cartoon imagery of other illustrious examples of great moments in bipartisan history, to remind us of the import of always seeking the approval of others before taking on great tasks?
I could not write this diary without getting bipartisan approval from every one here and at Redstate. That's the lesson I've learned from the announcement by Sen. Leahy that his proposed "Truth and Reconciliation Commission" would not happen due to no Republicans participating. His words are just a helpful reminder of how the greatest moments in bipartisan history occur. It is an abject lesson in the virtues of bipartisan approval for great endeavors.
Let's look back fondly now in (cartoonish) history
:) at some of the greatest moments in bipartisanship :)
and how they affected attempts at great historic endeavors and events:
Caveman Og calls off fire invention, cites lack of cooperation from animals who might be scared off by it. Instead, tribal humankind tries to heat food by shivering very hard in groups.
Cavewoman Orkette decides she not invent wheel, cites lack of bipartisan cooperation from men in tribe not interested in silly wheel contraption. Square stone much easier to push, wheel slip. Humanity forgets about wheels.
Ancient Greeks decide to ditch the Trojan Horse into the ocean and surrender to the Trojans because of a lack of bipartisan cooperation from Trojans unwilling to help build the Horse as a deceptive way to destroy Troy. The Greeks tire of trying to convince them, and decide it is ridiculous to do such hard work all by themselves.
Mongol hordes refuse to invade Rome upon learning of lack of bipartisan cooperation from Roman citizens more interested in bulimiac feasts and partying till they die. The Mongols turn their attention to conquering and pillaging more cooperative societies who enjoy invasion.
Saint Peter decides not to establish a church because of bipartisan objections from the Roman government. He decides instead to lead a humble and insignificant existence wandering the streets talking to himself.
Copernicus gives up his ridiculous ideas about the Earth not being the center of the universe due to bipartisan objections from the Church. He spends the rest of his life working at menial tasks for employers and patrons, relieved that his politically dangerous but fascinating work is finally ended.
The Continental Congress of the 13 US colonies decides not to declare independence from England because of lack of bipartisan cooperation from England. Said Thomas Jefferson, "I know King George and he's no mad man, he's a reasonable man, if he's opposed, what we are trying to do must be unreasonable."
Abraham Lincoln decides not to respond to the Fort Sumter attack by Southerners. He famously proclaims "A house divided against itself cannot stand. It requires bipartisan approval from all parties engaged in hostilities before hostilities can be waged. I see no reason that such cooperation can be achieved. Therefore I cave in to the Southern States agendas".
Adolf Hitler, due to bipartisan cooperation from Neville Chamberlain among others, decides to not wage a world war and instead resigns as Fuhrer and retreat to Berchtesgaden to indulge in his love for painting for the rest of his life. A tearful Hitler famously proclaims, "I was thinking of ruling the world by brute force and final solutions but Chamberlain was right, all I ever wanted all along was the Sudetenland region of Czechoslovakia. Now that I have it, I am fulfilled and humbly want to settle down with a charming lady named Eva who has caught my fancy".
Herbert Hoover gives up his investigation of John Dillinger due to lack of bipartisan cooperation from organized crime. Said Hoover, "We've got limited resources, and many other problems to focus on. Some suggested we try looking at his taxes, but that is a ridiculous idea. We're going by the book, and this book is empty and will never be written."
In Liverpool, an unknown band with a silly name of Beatles, announces they will disband due to lack of bipartisan cooperation from record companies to produce their music. Manager Brian Epstein said, "No one was interested, so the lads got realistic and saw there was no future in it." Paul McCartney said, "What's the point, you know, we have some good songs but if only the record company boys wrote them instead then we could get a hit, but they don't want us." Richard Starkey was excited about the breakup, "All I ever wanted was to open up a hair salon, so this is no big deal".
So you see, bipartisan approval is the ONLY WAY EVER TO ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING IN HISTORY... ESPECIALLY big things, hard things. Lesson learned-- Thank You Senator Leahy and your Democratic Party colleagues for helping us learn the hard lessons.