She’s brilliant — comically and politically brilliant and Sarah Silverman was definitely “on” Saturday night during a stand-up comedy celebration at the third annual Vulture Festival in New York City. During her routine, Silverman decided to science-womansplain what needs to be done in order to become the reproductively responsible country we long to be. Maxwell Strachan with Huffington Post was there when Silverman began her analysis.
“Here’s something that I learned that is fascinating, and it’s this: Scientists have found that sperms cells smell,” Silverman said. “Like I know sperm smells, but sperm cells have the sense of smell, and you know what that means: Sperm is life. And you know what that means: We’ve gotta legislate that shit.”
Yes, we do. With equal rights and all, it would be sexist not to help men regulate their bodies when GOP lawmakers are doing such an outstanding job trying to monitor and control the bodies of women. The Guttmacher Institute reports 1,106 sexual and reproductive health policies/provisions were introduced in 2016 as of May 1. Sure, only 70 of them were enacted, but it’s the thought that counts. Shouldn’t we be thinking of men too? Because you know, (shhhh) men can't really be trusted to control their own sexual instincts either. Silverman believes laws need to be passed in order to enhance awareness and stop men from killing their sperm with their own bare hands. Here’s what one of the procedures would look like:
“What we’ll do is — it’s a real simple procedure. We take a really long needle-like basically GoPro camera and we put it down your penis hole, urethra … then down into your testicular sack,” Silverman said. “We’re going to show you the ultrasound, so you can see the life in your balls.”
Okay, then. Strachan says Silverman’s goal is to “save these poor sperm cells,” and adds:
“You would not believe the amount of men that do not want to jerk off after that.”
Truly one of a kind. Thank you, Sarah Silverman. March on.